As a healing doctor and also a woman who has experienced a miscarriage, I have been on both the giving and receiving of care after a miscarriage. My perceive of a miscarriage exposed me to a whole gamut of emotions that I had no idea were linked with this kind of loss. In fact, I was totally unprepared for how hard it hit me. This made me to wonder: if, as a healing professional, there was so much I did not know about miscarriage - how coarse it was and how devastating and alienating it could be - then there was a possibility that lay women would know much less than I did.
In much of civilized society, particularly in the Western world, there is a lot of credence given to doctors ensuring that their patients are well informed; even when time does not permit in-depth conversations, reading materials are made ready to write back questions and feature key issues for patients to consider. In the United Kingdom, for example, the Miscarriage connection has leaflets that are ordinarily given to women after a miscarriage by the nursing staff. These leaflets write back so many typical questions linked with this kind of loss and offer follow-up support.
In the study I conducted among Nigerian women, the need for such reserve was made clear in some questions that were addressed by the study. When women who had admitted to having experienced a miscarriage were asked if the healing and nursing staff that handled their miscarriage treated them with condolence and understanding, the marvelous response, with 84% of the votes was, "Yes". This any way reveals an unacceptable estimate of women who do not remember being treated with condolence and understanding: approximately 1 in 6 women who had had a miscarriage.
Why are these figures foremost to any healthcare expert that wants to deliver quality care? In establishing the main sources of reserve these women have after a miscarriage, my study revealed that doctors and nurses were a more foremost source of reserve than even their parents, extended family or personal faith. In fact, the only source of reserve that had marginally higher votes was the spouse (or partner). If the healthcare staff is this foremost at such a scary, lonely and miserable time of their lives, then it is appalling that any one in such a capacity should be anyone less than sympathetic or supportive.
However, the doctor's role goes beyond hand-holding or platitudes. The woman needs, as I have already hinted at earlier, to understand what happened to her: the potential causes, the reasons for the decisions that were taken in the policy of her care and the potential emotional aftermath of her experience.
It is engaging that even though 84% remember being treated with condolence and understanding, only 56% did not blame the doctors for their loss. This is proof that poor communication between doctor and sick person is risky, giving rise to uninformed blame-placing. Paternalistic condition care delivery does not work, especially when it is an issue as sensitive as fertilization loss. Furthermore, it may sway time to come health-seeking behaviour; in the developing world where maternal mortality is a major problem, this is a risk that cannot be taken.
The role of the doctor in times of loss is very sensitive; we are not taught how to handle such roles in healing school. Some of us learn from personal experience; like me, we learn to do to other patients what we wish had been done for us. However, we all need to appreciate our point in times like these and rise to the occasion.
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